Saturday, March 12, 2011

Depression and Discomfort

The moment my doctor asked me if I am ready for medication, I said YES, thinking I am ready for it. The arv's comes with a packeage of side effects, I am experiencing some: head ache, nausea, vomitting, muscle pains and fever, i am feeling really uncomfortable. I am emotionally prepared for this but realizing physically I am not, I have low pain tolerance, I am not used in experiencing this kind of physical pain. VERY DISCOMFORTING. Since I am experiencing this side effects I asked the HR is I can delay my work for a few days to help me body adjust more to the medicines, I had to lie and I told them I have flu, after a few hour they responed, they are postponing my employment because they don't think I'm "FIT TO WORK", I felt sad, VERY DEPRESSING! I don't think they will still hire me, I don't want to lose hope but I am really feeling low. Iv'e been back and forth to pgh to have my check up, also I had to do series of lab test, the results were all normal so my doctor know the caused of my fever. She asked me if I difficulty in swallowing I replied yes, she asked me to open my mouth, she looked into it, she asked another doctors opinion: "IT'S HERPES"....... WHAT THE FUCK?? HERPES!!! I don't think herpes has a cure. I just want to disappear from that moment. So I was given another set of meds, antiviral meds. now I am depressed and I feel a little bit of discomfort. I am so close to being broke! I feel so sad that not even sex and porn can make me happy. I hope things will be better soon, I am not used to this. I really need a tight HUG! :-(


  1. you shouldn't have told the hr about you, taking meds, it's a big no no. jan ka nagkamali.

    herpes, is another virus borne disease. i dont think they can be cured. they can be controlled too,

    if i were you, try to have another opinion regarding that. with all due respect with the doctors sa pgh pero i think you need to see if that is really herpes.

  2. i read your old post your baseline cd4 was 400 ++, well its either herpes or candida-- painful swallowing may mean it has affected the esophagus, if its candida- there are white plaques- parang taho-- kung herpes- parang singaw BUT very painful, baka naman oral hairy leukoplakia ??? ano ba latest CD4 count mo????

    hmm ID ba yang doctor mo???napaka basic naman ng oral lesion , kailangan pang kumuha ng second opinion??? , well, just the bitchy me hehe